


Letting You In

by wonderlandiscrumbling



Series: Fear and Delight [2]
Category: Fright Night (2011), Underworld (Movies)
Genre: Comfort, Depression, M/M, Peter Has Depression, mention of alcoholism, vague allusion to self-harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-02
Updated: 2020-04-02
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:33:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23452516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wonderlandiscrumbling/pseuds/wonderlandiscrumbling
Summary: Peter isn't used to having somebody there for him when he's depressed, typically he's horribly dealing with depressive episodes on his own.
Relationships: Lucian (Underworld)/Peter Vincent
Series: Fear and Delight [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1670890
Comments: 8
Kudos: 20





	Letting You In

**Author's Note:**

> A short fic more so just to go into Peter's issues with depression.

Typically, when depression hit Peter it hit hard and suddenly. He hated how it could just come on all the sudden like that, leaving him not wanting to move from wherever he was, typically his couch. He would get up long enough to pour himself a drink or just get the bottle and bring it with him to the couch. If he was lucky then that was the worst of it, staring listlessly at his TV while show re-runs played, too mentally exhausted to change the channel or to just turn it off. Sometimes it got worse than that, darker, and it probably would have if he’d been alone. He still was on the couch, this time without the booze, the TV was on, but Lucian was sitting with him, petting his hair. Peter’s head rested against his lap, eyes closing as he focused on his boyfriend’s loving touch. He wanted to ask him why he was there, why he actually answered him when he’d called him at four in the morning crying like a lunatic. He couldn’t imagine anybody else would have come to his place to check on him, been that worried, if Lucian were anybody else, he probably would have blocked his number after a call like that. Yet instead he’d showed up, taken the bottle from Peter, guided him back to the couch where they’d sat like this for several hours.

“Sorry,” Peter spoke at last, voice quiet, he felt gross about himself.

Something terrible in his brain told him he wasn’t even depressed, that he was just attention seeking, that he was doing this to make somebody pay attention to him. He worried that were true, worried he was just a selfish prick taking Lucian away from something more important. 

“Why are you sorry?”

“This, making you come here.”

“You didn’t make me do anything; I was worried about you after that call.” 

“I shouldn’t have called.”

“No, I’m….I’m glad you did, I feel better being here with you than you being here alone.” 

Peter sighed, closed his eyes and just tried to think of something different. He knew deep down that Lucian was here because he loved him deeply, that nearly three months into this relationship he knew that Peter had issues with depression, that sometimes this happened, and that it could get very bad. They’d still not spoken about that, about the scars, his or Lucian’s. Peter figured scars sort of spoke for themselves sometimes. 

“I love you,” Peter whispered, it felt like something that should be said.

“I love you too,”

It was nice to hear it back, to know he cared. He tried not to think about the part of his mind telling him that he pitied him, that this was pathetic for him to act this way. He tried to remind himself he never would have called Lucian so early if he hadn’t felt like he needed him here with him, hadn’t felt like it would get bad if he hadn’t had him come over. He wanted to make himself understand that it was good to have somebody there for him when he was struggling, that therapists had told him it was good to talk about how he felt, to not keep it bottled in. He knew that was part of the reason he was in this state now, a few shit conversations with family, nightmares, and the passing anniversary of his parents’ deaths didn’t help. It all added up, pressure building until it finally burst leaving him like this. He wanted to apologize a few more times for it, for this, for himself, but he knew that wasn’t helpful. Lucian would just tell him again that he didn’t need to apologize, tell him again that he was here because he loved him and sometimes Peter scared him when he became distant, too distant. It was something he was working on, nobody in his past had wanted him to share with them, and that had always worked fine. At least he’d told himself in the past that it was working. He knew now that all of that had just made things worse.

It was another hour before he felt better enough to pull himself into a sitting position, still quiet and awkward as he leaned against Lucian’s side. He seemed content to hold him, kissing the top of his head, whispering that he loved him. Peter hid his face against his shoulder, nuzzling against him smelling his cologne, focusing on the pleasant warmth of his body. He couldn’t help that he felt like an idiot about this, that he was left feeling heavy limbed and just overall gross, there was the urge to drink, but he knew that Lucian wasn’t about to let him do that. 

“Thanks for being here, you’re the only person I’ve known who would care. I usually just shove all this shit down, keep it to myself, it’s weird somebody knowing.” 

He was adjusting to it, the foggy heaviness in his head dissipating leaving him feeling almost anxious about the past few hours. He pulled away from Lucian’s side, fidgeted with his fingers picking at his polish, playing with the rings on his fingers as something to distract himself. Lucian rubbed his back, watched him, and Peter trusted that he wasn’t judging him or reevaluating their entire relationship.

“It’s no problem at all, I don’t think it’s good to keep it to yourself. I’m always here, we never have to talk about it if you’re uncomfortable, but I’ll still be here if you want me to be.” 

Peter smiled; it was a brittle pitiful attempt at a smile anyway. He found himself back against his side, head resting against his shoulder. He still felt off, but not as bad as he had earlier in the day. Lucian held him close, didn’t ask him any questions or demand anything from him. It was nice being able to just be himself, sure it wasn’t the best part of himself, or the part that he enjoyed whatsoever, but it was still part of him and a part that Lucian wasn’t scared off by. He at least could feel comforted by that.


End file.
